Happy almost Friday, fellow blogger readers! Sorry for the delay in recent post. I did a lightening pole on an open forum. Took me a couple of days to gather my research tehee.I was compelled to do a little asking around about what’s too much in the bedroom. Kinky sex is necessary sometimes to keep things exciting, but there’s that ambiguous threshold that’s sometimes crossed when your partner takes things just a little too far. Blame it on the heat of the moment if you want, but it’s hard to recover from awkward “where did you learn that” or “why would you do that” bedroom moments. Of course, the best way to avoid such headaches is communication, but you’re never prepared for that moment until it arises. Again, it’s a matter of individual preference and it’s natural to test the sensual boundaries from time to time. So is it kinky or crossing the line? Take a look at what some of my bloggers had to say!
Spanking
I love it when my man grabs and smacks my booty. I like the feeling of being handled, especially when he’s getting it from the back and he’s got my hips clutched. Like the article said yesterday, I know he’s smacking it hard too but I can’t really feel it … it stings a little but it’s a good pain, I guess. I love getting tapped but I’m a hands only kind of girl. What I can’t get into is the whips and paddles … but I have been spanked with a hairbrush getting freaky in the bathroom! It was fun I didn’t mind it so much. Keisha, 26
I’m not getting spanked, I mean come on. But I’ll do it. Paddles and whips or whatever, not so much. Personally, I would feel slighted if a woman wanted me to use a paddle or whip on her because she’s then focused on a paddle and not me. Call me selfish but I want her to be focused on me, my hands or whatever else I decide smack that (booty) with. Marcus, 37
Bondage
I had this guy who was really into the ball gags and bondage roping. I thought that was something only white people do but he was really into it. It tripped me out because I wasn’t sure what to think about it. I said I wasn’t into it but he wanted me to tie him up, which was cool. But he really freaked me out when he wanted to be gagged with a ball that you strap to his mouth. And I thought I was freak! He freaked me under the table. That was just too much for me. Reese, 31
I’m going to tell you like this, I tried it once and that’s all I needed. Never again. I’ll cuff my lady and have my way with her because I like to be in control that way. Uh, but ropes and gag balls and masks are just too much. That’s not freaky that’s sick. I think when you get into that kind of thing it ruins the natural act of sex and intimacy. Cuffs and blindfolds, all day but I’m not with the heel that licking b.s. Bryan, 28
Choking
Now I was so against choking the man I’m seeing now put me onto it. He did it in a way that wasn’t too threatening. He’s an aggressive kind of man to begin with so when he did it the first time I was like ‘oh (snap). This is fun!’ I love it now and he chokes me all the time but not to a point where I can’t breathe. Like Mike Baisden says, ‘choke me ’till I’m woozy’ not ’till I pass out. Anita, 27
See I was into to the choking for a while until this one guy really scared me. And we were having pretty good sex up until that particular instance. We were into it and I said, you know, ‘choke me.’ Girl, his eyes lit up like it was Christmas and he choked me so hard and was saying, ‘take this (man part) like a (lady of the night)’ and ‘I knew you were a freak like me.’ But I was really turned off by this and never called him back. I know I asked for it, but I don’t want to be play raped either, you know? Michelle, 32
Dirty Talk
I’m okay with nasty talk. I like it when my boyfriend tells me to say his name or curses at me – I know it sounds crazy- but I love it when he curses and tell me what to do. It’s a mind game for me and I love to do what he tells me to do. Like when he says ‘put that (booty) up and (bang) this (man part’). That really turns me on. I love it! But no name calling! Ebony, 25
A woman can never say anything too freaky to me. Whatever she says, I like it! I don’t think women understand how nasty the mind of a man is. We love that super freaky (stuff) so please don’t be shy. You can moan it, scream it, shout it, whisper … I don’t care. Just make sure you put a ‘Daddy’ or ‘Papi’ at the end of that, and don’t forget to tell me who’s (lady part) it is. Is that too much to ask? I’ll do whatever your little freaky heart desires, it’s all about you baby. J.T., 32
Oral
Don’t gag me. I’m all for the hair pulling and deep throating and I’ll even let you finish. What I will not tolerate is you forcibly grabbing the back of my head and shoving your piece down my throat until I choke and gag. That is totally crossing the line and is completely disrespectful. Out of line. That’s just taking it too far and it’s a violation! Don’t like it. Reina, 28
Sweetheart, I am guilty of your complaint several times over. When you describe it that like, that’s pretty ruff. You don’t like that? That’s a part of the fun! To each her own, but open your mouth and say something! Okay, okay! I’m guilty of it. I hear you loud and clear. I’ll be better about that. Reina’s Boyfriend, 33
Weight in reader, let me know what you think. Are you kinky, freaky, prudish, sneaky freak or just plain ole boring?!?!?!
Oral Sex He'll Never Forget: 52 Positions and Techniques Guaranteed to Blow Your Man Away
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Sextra: Kink or Crossing the Line?
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
10 Reasons Why Black Women Should Date Outside Their Race
8 MM Men's Titanium ring wedding band with 9 large Channel Set CZ sizes 8 to 12
This topic seems like such a dead horse that keeps getting beaten, over and over again. But if you’re a woman, who happens to be African American, who also happens to be single, this is probably a scenario that crosses your mind more often as time progresses without a partner. Besides, black men date other races effortlessly so what’s the hold up for us sistas? Once you get past the not so chocolate brown skin and paler scrotums, men of other races are pretty much the same, right? Wrong. How often have you heard ” I’ve dated a (_____) guy, but I couldn’t sleep with him.” Every woman from Black, White, Asian, Latina to Middle Eastern love black men, but black women, however, tend to be exclusive to their own when it comes to dating. But is it in vain? Are the odds even in a black woman’s favor to acquire a black man or should they explore other options for a chance at relationship longevity? I asked my fellow bloggers in a blogger forum and this is what they had to say:
1. I don’t think black women should date outside their race, and that goes for the men too! There just aren’t enough strong black families out there, man. It’s heartbreaking. We’re a dying race and I just don’t see why black men are so quick to cross over to other races when they haven’t even given sistas a chance. But I guess that’s why we should eventually get used to the idea of multi-racial families because there aren’t enough black men to go around. And that’s too bad, just a sad state of affairs, man. Nicole, 32, Finance
2. As a person whose dated a white man, I think we should start dating other men just to kind of see what’s out there. Otherwise, you’re limiting yourself and love could be staring you in the face, but he’s just not black. And I tell you what, all it takes is that one date and you’ll notice that they’re just as much a man as a black one. So it’s not the best thing to wait around for that “mandingo” ’cause pickings are slim. Alena, 26, Manager
3. I’m not sure that I can really encourage black women not to date a black man. I personally have an affinity for my own, but I can only speak for myself. I think that if it’s a situation where the chemistry is undeniable, then go for it. But I’m more of an advocate of black man, woman and child. But these days love is blind, so I guess to each his own. I’ll never hate on love. Keith, 31, Construction
4. Why continue to set yourself up for a down fall? In this day and age, a good man, let alone a good black man is a rarity. So with that in mind, you’d be ignorant to put yourself through the drama of dealing with ni**as if they keep f*cking up? Try something or someone new because I gotta be honest, while I pride myself on being a good black man, most of my ni**as are not, unfortunately. Jermaine, 23, Author
5. Black women should date other races because black men have a reputation of not having their sh*t together. White men, and others, take pride in being a provider to their wife and kids. Some black men are so sorry anymore, they can’t get it together because they don’t have to, some other woman will do it for him. Now don’t get me wrong, my dad is a black man and is still very in love with my mother, they’ve been together for 30+ years. But they don’t make them like that anymore, sadly. Mimi, 29, Designer
6. I date white men and first, the myth is NOT true. Second, they spoil me more than any black man has. Third, they’re more goal oriented. A white man has it all planned out, he wants to be married by 30, have kids at 32, move to another state in a few more years, put the kids through college and finally retire with his lovely wife and travel the world. So, in my opinion, it might be the look if you want a real relationship and marriage. Courtney, 27, Registered Nurse
7. Well, I don’t really condone the idea, but honestly most black dudes are in jail, gay or have a record. I think, mathematically, it’s impossible for all black women to get a black man because of the reasons I just listed. It’s a harsh reality really, but what can you do? I would encourage black women to keep their options open and find love, no matter what they look like. Mack, 33, Mechanic
8. Ni**as date all kinds of females and so should black women! If ni**as can have their “snow bunnies” then I should I get my “Peter Cotton Tail.” It’s only fair. Go on and get you a white girl and watch how she’ll look 65 at 40 with wrinkles and vericose veins. Black don’t crack. No, in all seriousness, I’ve been single for almost two years now and I’ve never dated anyone else. I haven’t gotten to the point where I’m ready to date outside my race. So I guess I’ll be the only one who holds out until I find a black man because I know he’s out there, but as usual, he’s late as hell. Brandy, 31, Merchandising
9. Black women deserve to be more than “baby mamas” and that’s all that they have been for a while. Like how many dudes you got a child with a black woman who is all kinds of “b*tches” and “hoes,” but turn around and wife up the exotic, half-bred broad. That’s why so many women are wanting a dude to “put a ring on it” because they’re so desperate for commitment. Chicks aren’t getting any younger and don’t want to waste time in meaningless relationships, so by all means find your guy but he might not be what you’ve pictured since your childhood. Marcus, 30, Accountant
10. I say, why not? A man is a man, and we have to get over the color issue. I know it’s hard but seriously, why can’t you love someone other than a black man? It’s 2009 and race purity is so antiquated. I think black women have to stop being too picky and try. Try to date the white guy at your job who thinks you’re cute and wants to take you out, go for it! He may end up being your dream guy! Date who you want and be happy. Geeze. Zaria, 21, Med Student
What do you think my fellow bloggers? Weight in!!!
Monday, August 23, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
The Airport By Zane (Sex Chronicles II)
I look into your eyes and see the same sparkle that is in my own as you put your arms around me. Just then, a female customs agent approaches me and says she needs to search my bags. She is very pretty in her regulation uniform and has long, dark brown hair, hazel eyes and smooth, caramel skin just like mine. She searches my bags and then tells me she needs me to follow her to a room.
I grow concerned because I have no idea what she thinks I am guilty of. I follow her to a nearby room while you wait for me by the gate. She takes me in the room and tells me she needs me to disrobe so that she can strip search me. I ask why and she says it is common procedure, with women traveling alone from the islands, to ensure I am not smuggling drugs in as a mule.
I obey and take off my dress. I am braless and all that remains on are my red silk panties and my black high heel shoes. She instructs me to take my panties off as well. She approaches me and lifts up each of my breasts, examining them and I begin to realize what it is she really wants. She tells me to turn around and bend over the single table in the room and I comply. I feel her spread my ass cheeks open and then, without warning, she sticks a finger up my ass. I immediately get nervous because I have never been with a woman before. Yet, her hands on me, and now her finger in my ass, are making me very aroused.
I can see her take a seat in a chair at the end of the table out the corner of my eye. Then she sticks her tongue into my asshole and I shiver. While I know that you are waiting patiently for me to come back out to the gate, I begin to wonder how far she is going to take this.
I don't have to wonder long because she tells me to turn around and face her. As soon as I do, she cups one of my breasts in her hand and begins suckling on my nipple. More gently but with more intensity than any man ever has.
Suddenly, I hear the door creak open and you are standing there. You have a look of shock mixed with excitement on your face as you close the door asking, "What the hell is going on?" She looks at you and tells you, "Just watch and see!"
My ass is resting on the edge of the table as she lifts one of my legs up over her shoulder and begins sucking on my clit with a hunger I have never known. You can feel your dick come to attention because this has always been a fantasy of yours we have talked about but I swore I would never do. She sucks on my pussy for what seems like an eternity until you decide you can not take it anymore. You are about to bust.
You tell her to move out the way so you can taste my sweet pussy too, now dripping wet from all of the attention it has been given. She gets up from the chair so you can sit down and you push me all the way onto the table, forcing me to cross my legs behind your shoulders as you begin to devour my clit.
She watches for a few seconds and decides she will not be left out so she bends over and begins sucking on my breasts again. I caress the back of your neck and run my fingers through her hair with my hands. Her ass is protruding up in the air and you reach underneath the skirt of her uniform and start finger fucking her while she continues to suckle on my nipples. I can feel your tongue deep inside my throbbing pussy.
I tell you to get undressed, you do, and then I let you take my place on the table, lying you down on your back with only your feet hanging over the edge. I sit on your face while she begins to suck your dick, deep throating it without any hesitation. I am facing her, hands caressing your chest, watching her partake of your dick as you partake of my pussy and finger fuck my ass.
She comes up for air and I bend over to take over, sucking the head of your dick to get some of the precum out because I remember how delicious you taste. I con-tract my cheek muscles tightly around the head trying to get every possible drop I can. She is licking up and down the shaft of your dick and sucking on your balls while I continue to work on the head.
We both begin sucking and licking your dick. We are so hungry for you. I can feel cum trickling out of my pussy as you lap it all up off my thighs. Saliva starts to escape the sides of our mouths as we take turns deep throating your dick.
We can hear planes landing and taking off and people walking by in the hall but none of us gives a damn cause this is just too good to let go. Other than that, there are just a bunch of sucking noises and the delightful smell of sex in the air. The aroma is breathtaking.
As you suck on my clit even harder now, fingering my ass with one hand and palming an ass cheek with the other, I take my tongue and lick your belly button, then blow on it to make it dry before I wet it again with my tongue. I know how much that turns you on. I continue to do this for a couple of minutes while she deep throats your dick.
I slowly take my pussy off your face and slide my wet pussy down over your chest, then your belly button. I tell her to let go of your dick so I can straddle it. I sit on your dick, facing away from you so she can suck on my breasts while I ride your dick. I can feel the head of your dick begin to part my pussy lips as you pump your hips up to meet my downstrokes. You are still finger fucking my ass, but with two fingers now.
I move up and down on the shaft of your dick while she flickers her tongue at my nipples. You marvel at how tight my pussy is. I take a little bit more of it in each time I go up and down until it is all in. As I begin to grind my pussy onto your dick, she pushes both my tits together and suckles on both nipples at the same time.
Your back is arched off of the table meeting my every thrust as I start to ride your dick faster. I take my long tongue and flicker it over one of my nipples while she sucks furiously on the other one. My pussy is so hot and tight and you try to pump and reach the bottom of it harder and faster. I put my hands on your thighs so I can get better leverage and I begin to go up and down on your dick faster each time. You admire my ass, with your fingers in it, as it goes up and down. It looks so juicy.
Contracting my pussy muscles on your dick, I squeeze it hard as she gets the chair and sits down in front of us and begins to suck on my pussy and lick your dick while I am riding it, tasting us both at the same time. She reaches up and rubs my nipples while she is sucking on us both. I continue to fuck you hard and I can feel my cum trickling down the inside of my thighs, down between your thighs, and onto the tabletop.
You take your other hand and pull me back by my hair so that I am lying with my back on of your chest, still riding your dick. You start palming my breasts while she continues to get her eat on and we are all moaning. My pussy juice is everywhere. I want you to shoot your hot cum all down my throat and I ask you, "Will you cum for me?" and she says, "I want some of it too!" You tell me that, "Whatever you want, I will do." So I get off your dick and she and I both wait anxiously for you to give it to us. Your dick is throbbing and veins are popping out of it everywhere. You look so yummy.
We both get on our knees as you stand up. We begin licking and sucking all over your dick. You stand, your knees feeling a little wobbly, and hang on to the side of the table. I take the base of your dick in my hand and begin to squeeze it gently. You grab both of our heads and begin pumping your dick into our mouths fast and furiously. As I take your balls into my mouth and bounce them on my tongue, you tell us, "I'm about to cum!" We can hardly wait. It starts to shoot out and we both take some of it with our tongues and place some on our fingertips, rubbing it all over each other's breasts and faces, both of us smiling with delight. I whisper, "Hmmm, you taste so good boo."
I get greedy and I take your whole dick into my mouth, trying to get every last drop and contracting my cheek muscles around your dick, making all of it come out into my mouth as I arch my neck so your dick can hit my tonsils. You tremble as the last of it goes down my throat, but I continue to suck cause I want to get you hard again so you can fuck me in the ass before we leave. I tell you, "I want you to take all this ass right here!" She interjects and says, "We have to finish up before someone gets suspicious."
We all laugh as we get dressed. She finishes first and gives us both a smooch on the lips before she leaves saying, "Thanks for the afternoon snack!" We leave and go to the baggage claim, where my bags have been spinning around on the belt for the last half-hour or so. We go out to the car and you seat me in it while you put my baggage into the trunk. I sit in the car, waiting for you patiently, fingering my own pussy and then sucking my juices off my fingers. My pussy is so wet. After you get in and proceed to the exit gate, I take my free hand and rub it up and down your thigh, then to your crotch and start to undo your zipper.
You reach in the back seat and hand me the card and box of chocolate-covered cherries you bought for me because you missed me so much. After we clear the exit gate, I continue to caress your dick and balls with one hand as you finger my pussy. I put one of my feet up on the dashboard so that my leg is up in the air and you can get to my pussy better. I roll down the window so that the cool breeze can blow through my hair and hit up against my legs and pussy as we hit the highway.
I want you to fuck me again but I know I have to wait until we get home or at least until we get off the highway because I know how you like to make sudden stops. I decide to open the box of cherries instead and one at a time, I put them in my pussy, drowning them with my juices and then begin feeding them to you with my fingers. Needless to say, we pull off at the first rest area we come to. And there, on the hood of your car, you give me what I crave and fuck me in my ass just the way I love it.
Now that I have made you hawt and bothered! Zane she is the best!
Is Dating A Friend’s Ex An Absolute No-No???
Here’s a subject that never gets old… Is it ever okay to date a friend’s ex???
Most people say no, but rumor has it Kim Porter pounced on her friend Misa’s man Diddy, Dame Dash scooped up Aaliyah after Jay-Z and it’s no secret that Seal Married Heidi Klum years after dating Tyra Banks.
Would you ever date a friends ex? Does it take careful negotiation and frank discussions to keep all the relationships intact? Would you ever give a friend your blessing to try your sloppy seconds after you’ve moved “On To The Next One?
I think it really depends on the feelings the person closest to you had/has for the prospective new beau and the circumstances of their past courtship. As a rule, a man or a woman should never come between true friends and generally speaking it’s not a good idea to mess with someone one of your friends slept with or officially dated, like boyfriend/girlfriend.
The main reason being is that people are territorial. Once you share bodies with someone you actually liked at some point, you sometimes feel a sense of “ownership.” Even if you don’t want to be with them anymore you might still feel “weird” knowing that now someone else is hitting that. It’s even weirder when it’s someone you know.
On the flip side, there are instances where you might truly not give a rat’s ass about the person. Maybe y’all weren’t compatible; never had sex or only did it just once; you hate their guts; or became best friends, whatever the reason, you’re cool with them seeing whomever they want—including someone you know. The only thing that’s required in that scenario is a honest conversation with your friend to make sure he or she is cool with it and then you’re good to go.
You just have to know your friend well enough to make sure they’re not just lying to save face. Because if they are and you proceed to see their old flame—thinking you have the green light—you’ll be in for a big surprise when you notice how you’re getting some serious side-eye from your friend. For the most part, this situation is harder to deal with between women. Now, I’m not saying ALL women are catty but a good majority are. #ImJustSaying. (Most) Guys on the other hand can talk things out a little better.
I think we all have people we "hooked-up" with that really we had no emotional attachment to. Just physical... I believe in the 3-R's (Recycle, reduce, reuse). So there are partners I had for 15 years. I have had honestly a few girlfriend date my leftovers... I will go on record by saying I have never done that. I am too much of a visual person. Yuck!
It’s not like I could sleep with someone for that long and not have any kind of emotions involved, but I’m a rational person. I knew I didn’t want to be with him at all; so why should I stand in his way if one of my girls wanted to offer him something I wasn’t willing to? Still, I can’t front like it wasn’t weird seeing a man I was intimate with dating someone that was the closest thing to a best friend at the time. But, again, I knew I didn’t want to be with him beyond the physical so it was pointless to cockblock on my boy.
Maybe that’s just me.
Basically, this is an issue about the statute of limitations on penis/cucci. If you’re friend had physical relationships with this guy and things just didn’t work out, depending on how deep things were he may be off the market—at least for a few a years if they were never “official” BF/GF. But if she truly has no feelings for dude and several years have passed, some could say he’s fair game with her permission just as a courtesy.
As for the whole issue of people claiming any and every person they’ve ever known as “off limits” that can be a bit impossible. We live in a day an age where we’re all are just a few FaceBook friends away of knowing each other. With that said, we’d all be off limits if we played by those rules. As long as the relationship you care about most is intact you’re straight in my book. Everyone needs to be open and honest, when you go behind someones back and sneak that makes you guilty of something which is a bitter pill to swallow. Just be honest and open with your friend, because we all know what is done in the dark WILL come to light! Just sayin'
Do you think it’s trifling to date someone your friend once had an interest in? Does it matter whether your friend was intimate with the person or not? What if the person you were interested in was your friend’s ex boyfriend/girlfriend? Is it more acceptable to date the ex of a friend if a good amount of years went by since they were together? Or are there certain lines that friends don’t cross? Would you give your blessing if a friend wanted to date an ex you didn’t care about? Do you think the friend in this letter has a right to cockblock on the writer pursuing this guy? Would you let a man/woman come between one of your friendships?
Speak your piece…
Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back!
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Things to come once I get not looky lous but participants on my blog
So... we all know with modern technolgy I can tell how many visitors I get on my blog right?? Cant yet see whom they are but I know how many clicks I get.. Whelp with that said, I have soooo much to talk about, debate, piss off, judge, slam about I want people who will participate in the discussions.. Because guess what? the shit I add on here takes some coding! this isn't facebook or myspace! People who blog actually have to know what the fuck they are doing i.e. html coding etc to post stuff!
Back to my title...
Up coming topics once I have people who are not peekers but SPEAKERS...
1) How many womem "fake" not knowing the 'game' (women who date men who THINK they are running game on them, but the whole time we see thru there fake asses). But again we might not need to talk about that because I think men honestly think their lame ass game is working. shuck and jive ladies!!!!!!
2) Who cheats better, women or men?????? again, once I get more participants I will speak on this. For my friends, they KNOW I have a lot to say. But the dead silence on my page, seeing how many views I get, naw no fair. Participate or get the fuck off my page. real talk!
3) At the tender age of *beep* I have never, nor do I now, have the dreams of white picket fences, two kids and a smelly ass dog??? WHAT THE FUK ME IS WRONG WITH MI?
Mic drops exit stage left! or whatever horse you rode on in... beat it! Your mommy needs to blow your nose for you!
Friday, August 20, 2010
'The Ring': Episode 2 - Preserving Your Sexy
Is it okay to get so comfortable in your relationship that you stop putting forth an effort to maintain your physical appearance? On this episode of the 'The Ring,' Rebecca Brody and Mason Jamal lace up and square off over how much importance should be placed on preserving the sexy for your significant other. Watch -- and then weigh in.
Watch more AOL Black Voices videos on AOL Video
Watch more AOL Black Voices videos on AOL Video
Sextra: I Don’t Like Getting Head (Chronicle II)
Hello my fellow bloggers today is Friday! whoot whoot! I am posting a question from a friend of mine. Good read I hope you enjoy.
I am 35 years old and I love sex just like the next man. I’ve been with my girl for a year and I love her but I don’t know how to get her to understand that not every man needs to get head all the time to be sexually fulfilled.I know I am not alone in this but she’s never been with a man like myself. I’ve just never been a gotta have head kinda dude. I absolutely love wild, circus monkey sex but I don’t need head. As a matter of fact I can do without it, it’s cool but It’s not what I need to get me in a zone, all I need is her and I give her head all the time. I like it she loves it and I feel like I’ve done my part. I understand she wants to return the favor but I don’t need it and most times don’t want it. It softens my erection and she feels bad. Not that she’s not good at it, all I want is her and for her to feel good and because she feels good, I do too. I don’t know how else to communicate to her that it’s nothing she does or doesn’t do for that matter. Women are so complicated.
---Hummmm ok my friend----
Okay, so . . . wow! You don’t like to have oral sex performed on you but your girlfriend is taking it personal. When it comes to matters of intimacy, you cannot communicate enough! “I’m just not a head kind of guy” is probably not enough of an explanation for her grasp the concept of you not wanting oral sex. She may be feeling as though you’re letting her down easy or that you don’t like her style, regardless of how much you try to convince her otherwise. Most men can’t get enough head and for your arousal to lessen as a result of it is, more than likely, a shot to her pride. I have too had a partner that didn't want me to do that to him because he looked at me as his queen and didn't think head should be given by a queen but only from, welp basically jump-offs... Since I have TMJ I really didn't mind not giving it. Yeah I said it! ha!
Ok back to you, I say thoroughly explain to her why it’s not your preference and if you don’t articulate it any better than you did in your letter, then how do you expect her to understand? Paint the picture for her! If it’s because you don’t like the look of a woman’s head in your lap, then say that! If you don’t like the noises paired with the feeling, tell her! If you take issue with the fact that she kisses you, her loved ones and, possibly, her children with her mouth, let it be known! If you haven’t already, really explore, in your own mind, what it is that turns you off about it and share it with her.
Maybe, in time, you can graduate to allowing her to orally stimulate you. Sex is give and take so you have to be open to things she likes also. Maybe you can talk her through it . . . tell her what it is that feels good about her oral work and what she could do more of, focus on what’s pleasurable, three minutes won’t kill you. BAW-HAHAHA And, over time, you might begin to appreciate the art of fellatio and that she wants to do it to you! Hope this helps and good luck to you!
What are your thoughts Steph Boggie bloggers?
Have a blessed weekend my friends! xxoo
Thursday, August 19, 2010
A List of Ways to Be a More Supportive Partner (Part 2)
Reconnect - a lot of times, we tend to get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of our daily lives we neglect our personal lives and the people in it. Sometimes a night without outside distractions from the television, computer and cell phone is powerfully refreshing. Take a walk or enjoy a quiet dinner with your loved one, discuss the day and enjoy being in each other’s space. Sounds corny, right? But it goes a long way! Just sayin'
Take Initiative - sometime people just need a little push and support to really pursue a hobby or interest. For example, if your loved one loves to cook and rants a raves about wanting to learn more about it, do the research, find a class or workshop and extend the information. A simple, “hey, I thought you might enjoy something like this” goes a long way. Means you’re listening and supportive of their endeavors. Positive begets more positive!
Listen Closely - they say that listening is the lost art, so apparently that means we could all do a lot more of it! It’s one thing to hear what’s being said but listening is completely different. A lot of times, you don’t even have to say a word in return if you’ve listened close enough and sometimes a response is unnecessary and unwanted when you’ve devoted your attention to the one who’s in need of an ear.
Refrain From Fussing - we all go against each other’s greater instincts from time to time and sometimes unsuccessfully so. However, the last thing anyone needs to hear after an epic fail is “I told you so. None of this would’ve happened if you had just listened. See, didn’t I tell you?” Don’t do that! Even though an “I told you so” is in order, it can wait . . . forever! Listening and an, “I’m sorry it didn’t work out but we’ll get through it” kind of attitude is far more encouraging than a fuss bucket!
Celebrate Milestones - who cares what it is, celebrate it! It could be something as simple as making a monthly goal at work, completing a marathon or shedding some pounds! Recognize the results and celebrate them. It doesn’t have to be over the top, a few balloons and roses or a home-cooked meal and card would do the trick. A small token of recognition always resonates with the person on the receiving end!
In relationships, the old saying, “little things mean a lot” still rings true and could really smooth out those rocky patches every couple encounters from time to time.
What are your thought, bloggers? Please share them!I love feedback so please comment below.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Love & Marriage: Blow His Mind (Part 1)
1.Dirty Talking: This is a great way of eliciting consent from your partner for the things you want to do.
2.Use Your Hands: This is perhaps the most important thing to remember! A blow job is not all about the mouth…to do it well, you need to alternate hand action with mouth action. This also keeps both parts of your body from getting tired.
3.Experiment, But Not TOO Much: Try new things and when you find what he likes, stick to them for a while and let him enjoy. Don’t try all 359 new tongue tricks you read about in one sitting. It’s overwhelming and ineffective. Too much switching up keeps you further and further away from the end goal…an orgasm.
4.Be The Eye Candy: Much of the excitement from the blow job comes from what he is seeing…so give him something to look at! Make eye contact, look like you are enjoying your work…think about how enthusiastic the ladies look in porn. If you appear to be tired or bored, no matter how good what you are doing feels, your lack of enthusiasm takes a toll…and is probably prolonging the end goal, which is gonna make you even more tired or bored.
5.Ask The Owner: While visual cues are important (i.e. if he looks happy, he probably is), it’s important that you communicate verbally as well. Keep your inquiries simple: “Do you like this?” “How does that feel?” “What do you want me to do now?”
More tips in my next column, ladies and gents! And if you have some specific questions about performing mind-blowing mouth jobs…please don’t hesitate to ask them below!
Listen to this new Kem off his new album Intimacy
Moviesucktastic: Before INCEPTION, there was... DREAMSCAPE (1984)
Moviesucktastic: Before INCEPTION, there was... DREAMSCAPE (1984): "Cover of DreamscapeYears before Christopher Nolan had Leonardo DiCaprio teaching Ellen Page how to steal secrets from people’s dreams, Denni..."
Chronicle #1:
Love is NOT enough. Marriage takes work.
You vowed forever. Forever is a VERY long time. We can't even live without doing the work it takes to stay alive. So why don't we fight for our marriages (the good ones or ones with potential) just as hard? Why are people so quick to call it ...quits in their marriage because it's gotten a little difficult? Why not do the work?
Come on Black people we have to do better!
This is just sad and embarassing! As a race we have to do better. Sorry I feel like my B.S. degree isn't even enough...
Your thoughts..
News: Mother Charged in Death of Boys Found in S.C. River
Unemployed, single and apparently fed up with criticism from her mother, a 29-year-old Orangeburg, South Carolina, woman suffocated her two toddlers with her bare hands before strapping them into car seats and submerging her car in a river, authorities said Tuesday.
Shaquan Duley is facing two counts of murder in the deaths of her sons, ages 1 and 2, said Orangeburg County Sheriff Larry Williams. She is set to appear in court Wednesday.
“She was a mother that was unemployed. She had no means of taking care of her children,” Williams told reporters. “She lives with her mother and her mother was a very, I guess, firm individual. … She often talked with her daughter about, I guess, maybe being more of a mother or being more reliable.”
Mother and daughter argued the night before the children’s bodies were found early Monday in Duley’s Chrysler sedan, submerged in the Edisto River, he said.
“We believe this is a direct response (to the argument) from Ms. Duley,” he said. “I believe she was just fed up with her mother telling her she couldn’t take care of the children and she wasn’t taking care of her children and she just wanted to be free.”
CNN.com
Read the rest of the story at CNN.com
Lust or Love....
In light of all the recent headlines that are exposing the cheating ways of many, it leaves one to wonder what it is that makes someone recklessly abandon their marriage. Is it simply infatuation or lust? Or are they confusing their casual encounters for love? Either way, the differentiation between lust and love begs discernment lately, no? While it’s completely healthy to lust after someone you love, it’s a gamble to try and turn a fling into a solid, loving partnership! The latter hardly works because it lacks the foundation! With everything being so instantaneous in this day and age, we wait for nothing yet expect stellar results with very little effort. It’s kind of like trying to microwave a gourmet meal – never works. A strong partnership takes time and lots of work. So why should one feel the need to work if the prize has already been won and the goods have already been consumed? We asked a few people what the difference is between lust and love and here’s what they had to say.
Lust is normally synonymous with infatuation. Love, to me, means experience. Lust is funny because when you’re caught in the moment and everything around you, it’s not necessarily the person! The setting, where you met that person or that particular moment sometime gets mistaken for something deeper. But once it’s over and you really start to get to know him, the fire dies and you don’t want him anymore or vise versa. Most people don’t really know what love is and that’s why they’re often confused! Love is hard and never easy. Love is sticking by someone no matter what the situation may be. The moment you start to pray for someone more than yourself, that’s love. – Layla, 31
Lust is a feeling, purely sexual. Loving is not only wanting to have sex with someone but also spending time with them and getting to know them. Love is leaving you with feelings of having some kind of stock invested into the relationship. I wonder how some people do it though. They base their relationship purely on infatuation or lusting after a person. Some people think that if they are attracted to someone, that’s all there is to have in a relationship … almost like lust turns into love by force. Men, when we’re looking for love we want the whole package. She doesn’t have to be a 10 but attractive to me. Maybe come from a good family with good morals and healthy relationships! Hey, that’s a 10! Men won’t stay with a women who doesn’t have more to offer than good sex. – Charlie B., 33
I’ve been guilty of confusing the two once or twice in my life. But now that I’m a little older I can say that lust and love are often confused because people are too quick to proclaim this deep, affectionate love for someone without knowing them while enjoying all the benefits of a long lasting relationship. Does that make sense? Like, I think people confuse good sex with love. You can have phenomenal sex with someone without even knowing their name and so it goes, you meet a someone, you go on a couple dates and now you’re physical … regularly. But a few more months into it, it’s messy and you’re at each other’s throats if it’s not over already. Love takes time and I think the people forget that you have to be friends with your partner first. If you’re friends first, you can overcome all obstacles because the framework is in place. You can’t build a friendship out of lust or an infatuation, in my opinion. – Kay, 29
The huge difference between lust and love is: lust is more of a good time or an “in the moment” type of deal. Love is when you get into the deeper parts of a person. You want to get to know the mental more so than the physical, you start to think about the future with that person and really take a personal interest in them and their well being. And that’s when the romance and the cooking dinners together and the massages come in, it’s the total package, you know? Lust and love get confused because people get tunnel vision, they’re moving too fast and abandon the bigger picture for a moment or moments. But all that means is they weren’t fully invested in the relationship to begin with. Love would pretty much dispel all those urges to go astray. – Kristoff, 30
There’s no real right answer to that. Love and lust mean different things to different people. That’s why it’s so important to get to know each other before you start getting into the physical aspects of the relationship. You should really find out whether your goals and aspirations in terms of love, family life and the future parallel in ways that are beneficial to the both of you. Then you can build. When you do too much too fast you crash and burn. I guess I’m old-fashioned in that way but it’s okay to take your time with these things. I know it sounds like idealistic but I can happen. I have hope. – J.D., 31
Chime in Bloggers, what ya think? I would like to know how you guys feel...
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
COME ON THIS IS TOOOOO MUCH!
Kim Kardashian wants to keep her relationship private.
The socialite - who recently confirmed she is dating NFL player Miles Austin - is keen to keep their romance out of the public eye as much as possible, meaning he won't appear very much in her reality TV show 'Keeping Up with the Kardashians'.
Kim - who previously dated sportsman Reggie Bush - said: "I want to keep things a little more private this time around.
"I know that there was a teaser with Miles on the show. You probably won't see him as much because he's busy with his career, but there might be a party that he was at and he'll be in the background or something like that.
"I've been single for - I think it's been, what six or seven months or something? Six months - so it's a process. You'll see a little bit of it, and when we're not filming, you know, obviously, there might be some people that I went on dates with that I didn't capture. I'm happy and I'm living my life, focusing on me right now."
While Miles will appear in parts of the series, Kim says she would happily date someone who would refuse to be in it.
She told America's OK! magazine: "Absolutely, I have. But, then again, I like to keep it all the way real. It just depends. If you date me during season, you know, or if we're not filming, lucky for you. But if we are filming, it's hard, because, you know, we all go out, we're all with the family."
The Daily Love Advice:
_The love reflected from another person has its source in your own heart...
_Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle....
"Life is too short NOT to create something with every breath we draw."
Hip-Hop Rumors: Def Jam Scared Of Jeezy/Ross Beef? Game Loses One? Pause, Fabolous!
Hip-Hop Rumors: Def Jam Scared Of Jeezy/Ross Beef? Game Loses One? Pause, Fabolous!
You know who Dice Raw is right? Once upon a time, he was the young buck down with The Roots from the streets of Philly Town. Over 10 years later, he's not the young buck of old, but he is still down with The Roots. I am hearing that the homey has been taking meetings up there at Def Jam and may be looking to sign. Dude is in the building now that he's all over The newest album by The Roots. Who knows? I think he should opt for a smaller label that would be able to help him grow.
Speaking of Def Jam. Where is that Redman album?
DEF JAM TRYING TO DIFFUSE THE BEEF - JEEZY AND ROSS
SO, here is the latest on this beef between these two trappSTARS. I am hearing that this is actually getting serious and its highly likely that it is not marketing. I know people think Jeezy is just trying to get hot in the streets, but think back for a few. Remember how BIG Jeezy was when he was "down" with BMF? You may not remember the fear that was associated with that whole period of time. BMF had a huge sign as you got in Atlanta. So, now that Ross has kinda aligned himself with the "brand" so to speak....its getting serious and its not fake. Def Jam is apparently taking steps to make sure they aren't overtly lashing out at each other. So, Ross' "The Summa's Mine" goes hard but doesn't mention Jeezy's name. Hmmmmm....we're is LA Reid when you need him!?!
THE GAME LOSES ONE
I am being told that The Menace, one of Game's BWS homeboys is now a defector from the crew. The rapper was one of the more promising rappers, who had an album called Menace To Society. For whatever reason, Menace is now in a new video with Big Fase 100 showing no loyalty to Game. As you know, Game really isn't too cool with his family. Anybody know exactly what is going on here. I know I just featured somebody dissing Game, but I don't remember dude's name.
PAUSE, FABOLOUS!!!!!!!!
You know, I HAD to PAUSE Fabolous when I happened to be watching this freakin show Tosh.B or something. Fab popped up on the show and gave the definition of DOCKING. This ain't new, but it is to me. Fab, I am officially pausing you late. Pause!
WHO: illseed
WHAT: Rumors, Funnies, Fails and more!
WHERE: illseed.com, twitter.com.illseed
HOW: Send your rumors, sightings and ill pics to illseed at allhiphoprumors@gmail.com.
DICE RAW TO DEFJAM?
You know who Dice Raw is right? Once upon a time, he was the young buck down with The Roots from the streets of Philly Town. Over 10 years later, he's not the young buck of old, but he is still down with The Roots. I am hearing that the homey has been taking meetings up there at Def Jam and may be looking to sign. Dude is in the building now that he's all over The newest album by The Roots. Who knows? I think he should opt for a smaller label that would be able to help him grow.
Speaking of Def Jam. Where is that Redman album?
DEF JAM TRYING TO DIFFUSE THE BEEF - JEEZY AND ROSS
SO, here is the latest on this beef between these two trappSTARS. I am hearing that this is actually getting serious and its highly likely that it is not marketing. I know people think Jeezy is just trying to get hot in the streets, but think back for a few. Remember how BIG Jeezy was when he was "down" with BMF? You may not remember the fear that was associated with that whole period of time. BMF had a huge sign as you got in Atlanta. So, now that Ross has kinda aligned himself with the "brand" so to speak....its getting serious and its not fake. Def Jam is apparently taking steps to make sure they aren't overtly lashing out at each other. So, Ross' "The Summa's Mine" goes hard but doesn't mention Jeezy's name. Hmmmmm....we're is LA Reid when you need him!?!
THE GAME LOSES ONE
I am being told that The Menace, one of Game's BWS homeboys is now a defector from the crew. The rapper was one of the more promising rappers, who had an album called Menace To Society. For whatever reason, Menace is now in a new video with Big Fase 100 showing no loyalty to Game. As you know, Game really isn't too cool with his family. Anybody know exactly what is going on here. I know I just featured somebody dissing Game, but I don't remember dude's name.
PAUSE, FABOLOUS!!!!!!!!
You know, I HAD to PAUSE Fabolous when I happened to be watching this freakin show Tosh.B or something. Fab popped up on the show and gave the definition of DOCKING. This ain't new, but it is to me. Fab, I am officially pausing you late. Pause!
FAB!!!!! SHEEESH!!!!
JA RULE TALKS "UNFAIR" 50 CENT BEEF
Ja Rule feels there is a double standard with his beef with 50 Cent and others such as Rick Ross. Peep what he told VIBE.com.
On aftermath of beef with 50 Cent
“I feel like everybody deserves a second chance to do whatever. Really, I feel that my situation was an unfair situation. A very unique, very odd situation. Nobody ever seen anything like that in hip-hop, you know? I laugh when I see people say s**tlike, “Yo, [50 Cent] kilt Rule, but he didn’t kill Ross.” No disrespect to Ross, but he did 180-something [first week sales of Teflon Don]. I went platinum with R.U.L.E. after I made Blood In My Eye. I look at s**tlike that and… I don’t know, take it how you want to take it. I was a much bigger selling artist than just platinum so I guess that’s why people felt I took a hit. But the music industry was taking a hit at that time, too. You can’t really judge it or try to make an issue out of it, or an excuse. It just is what it is. To me it’s just one of the weirdest moments in hip-hop.”
Well, Ja Rule is still doing music and just released a new song called "Man Down."
DL it here.
ILLSEED'S QUICKIES
How the devil did Bizzy Bone get a deal with Cash Money?
According to MediaTakeOut, Bow Wow is already getting his swerve on with a Latina babe, not Angela Simmons. I suspect this is all confusion.
It doesn't look like Lil Wayne is getting out of jail early.
Waka Flocka and Gucci Mane are cool again. Deb Antney, Waka's mom, told them they better be cool or else they are going to have to contend with HER. just kidding.
Fantasia's married man "Cook" has been seen leaving his residence with all his stuff, suggesting that he's out of there. Wonder if dude is helping 'Tasia out or just out.
There is a positive rumor going around about Montana Fishburne that may see a change in her strange, lil life. I would tell you, but it may jinx it.
Wyclef doesn't seem to have the residence credentials to run for president of Haiti. Now, it seems like Clef knew this and had an answer, but it does not seem so positive at of my writing this.
How is that new Young Jeezy mixtape? Should I go and DL it?
I heard NY radio star Egypt recently got married to her longtime fiancee. That's a good woman off the market.
Brian Pumper, the disgraced porno master, is reportedly refuting that his jewels are fake. Pause. Dude is countering the jokes of his porno pals that all his jewels are as fake as the boobs on a Barbie.
T.I. had a secret show in NYC last night and Cam'ron showed up to support.
Folks in Cleveland are saying that Lebron James may have a sextape by some local girl. I cannot claim to
THE DAILY TWO SENSE
Hmmmm...Kanye West stopped following that UK dude and now he only follows Justin Bieber, the pop star. Why? I don't know. Maybe he wants to study the lil dude and see how to get 4.5 million followers? I dunno. Anyway, the two have been going back and forth on Twitter for a few days. Go figure.
IS FASHION DESIGNER RAPPING ON KANYE'S NEW ALBUM?
There is a rumor that Kanye will offer a designer a chance of a life time. The name is Phillip Lim and its a name that was unfamiliar to me until I did a bit of research. Here is what Wiki says, "Phillip Lim (born 1973 in Thailand [1]) is an American fashion designer of Chinese ancestry.[2] He was awarded the 2007 Council of Fashion Designers of America Emerging Talent in Womenswear award for his work as creative director of Phillip Lim." Interesting, eh? He also said the following about his new album, that he'd look to feature Nicki Minaj, John Legend, Mos Def, Pusha T, Swizzy and others. Go Pusha T! LOL!!! Dude has come a long way since "The Funeral."
THE GAYS PRESSURING QUEEN LATIFAH?
Uh...You know...I have historically attempted to steer clear of Queen Latifah since she is such an enduring figure in the rap game. But, it is what it is at this point. She was seen out and about with another female NOT her "trainer." Also, I am hearing that the Gays are attempting to force the Queen to come out of the closet and be one of them in the public. Like, you know...join the movement officially like Rosie O'Donnell. As long as Rosie Perez doesn't join, I'm good. Here are some pics.
Jay-Z, Diddy, Akon Top Forbes' 2010 "Hip Hop Cash Kings" List
For the second year in a row, S. Dot Carter tops the Forbes rankings. See what estimated sum your favorite star brought in.
Despite the rocky economy of this past year, Hip Hop's elite have still found a way to keep their earnings piling in.
Forbes has put out their 2010 Forbes "Hip Hop Cash Kings" list, which includes many returners as well as some rookies. For the second year in a row, Shawn “Jay-Z” Carter tops the list with estimated gross earnings of $63 million, while second- ranked Sean “Diddy” Combs pulled in $30 million.
For the second year in a row, S. Dot Carter tops the Forbes rankings. See what estimated sum your favorite star brought in.
Despite the rocky economy of this past year, Hip Hop's elite have still found a way to keep their earnings piling in.
Forbes has put out their 2010 Forbes "Hip Hop Cash Kings" list, which includes many returners as well as some rookies. For the second year in a row, Shawn “Jay-Z” Carter tops the list with estimated gross earnings of $63 million, while second- ranked Sean “Diddy” Combs pulled in $30 million.
For the second year in a row, S. Dot Carter tops the Forbes rankings. See what estimated sum your favorite star brought in.
Despite the rocky economy of this past year, Hip Hop's elite have still found a way to keep their earnings piling in.
Forbes has put out their 2010 Forbes "Hip Hop Cash Kings" list, which includes many returners as well as some rookies. For the second year in a row, Shawn “Jay-Z” Carter tops the list with estimated gross earnings of $63 million, while second- ranked Sean “Diddy” Combs pulled in $30 million.
Mr. Carter’s earnings stemmed from the release of his album Blueprint 3, the launch of his worldwide tour, his 40/40 nightclub chain, as well as his partial ownership of the New Jersey Nets. Diddy’s role in Get Him To The Greek, Diago vodka, Ciroc, Diddybeats ear-buds, and other miscellaneous roles in television and film, helped him cash in his $30 million.
Lady Gaga, the Konvict Clothing label, and a World Cup soccer ad campaign with Pepsi, assisted Aliuane “Akon” Thiam in his first top five appearance on Hip Hop Cash Kings. Akon ranks number three with $21 million, and right behind him Dwayne “Lil Wayne” Carter lands himself a spot at number four with $20 million. Andre “Dr. Dre” Young rounds out the top five with $17 million from his Beats by Dr. Dre headphone line.
Check out the rest of the list, and the estimated earning of the 2010 Forbes "Hip Hop Cash Kings"
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